It’s almost 1am and I am a mess. Feeling extremely lost and crying to myself while I listen to James Bay.
X and I have been trying to have a conversation for the past week. But our schedules never work out… we are always busy when the other calls.
I miss S. I wanted to text him but I stopped myself.
I am in the chapter of my life where I do not know what I want as a career and what I want as love… sometimes I look at the two chairs in my living room and I wonder, what would life have been if S and I continued and moved in together…. and then I thought about it some more and realized… that is something he will never give me.
And that is what makes the tears flow… when love itself is not enough.